COUNSELING IN CHILD EVANGELISM

 

 

1.     Counseling – Professional advice about a problem e.g. (a) Marriage guidance counseling (b) A student counseling, according to Thompson

2.     Counseling, according to Thompson (1992) “Is a process that involves a relationship between two people who meet, so one person can help the other to resolve a problem.

Counseling means giving advice or direction, it means warning, guiding or recommending a person on the right steps to take.

Christian counseling is a process of giving godly guidance, direction and warnings from the Word of God in order to help a person overcome and find solution to problems.

 

PREPARATION FOR COUNSELLING TIME:

The counselor must take the following steps:

a)     Pray before counseling a child.

b)    Rely of the Holy Spirit to expose the needs of the child.

c)     Pray that the child will be open.

d)    Pray that God will fill your mouth with questions to ask and how to solve the problems of the child.

e)     Child needs privacy – Get a very quiet place where there will be no intruder.

 

COUNSELLING TME

a)     The teacher and the child must pray together before counseling start.

b)    The teacher will ask the child different questions to direct the child’s problem e.g.

                                i.            Please tell me your name and about yourself.

                              ii.            Why are you here to me or when the invitation was given, why did you come out?

                            iii.            Is there anything worrying you at home, in the school, in the church?

                           iv.            Teacher will form other questions from the answers of the child. Note that no two counseling sessions are completely the same. The teacher must be patient and loving.

c)     Do not ask questions that require “Yes or No” answers. The questions must be thought provoking ones.

d)    Your words and language should be simple and easy for them to understand. Listen attentively to the child and don’t interrupt.

e)     Use bible stories and personal experience to help the child. Give the child a bible verse or both to take him/her.

f)      Ask the child what he/she can do to solve the problem. Give practical solution or help her from the word of God and encourage him/her to make a positive decision.

g)     Counseling time should be a confidential time. Keep their secrets but if there is need for sharing with people that can help convince the child.

h)    If it is a difficult case you cannot handle, refer to someone that can help. The matter can be taken to the pastor and any other person that needs to know.

In conclusion, the child must be protected.

 

WHY THE NEED FOR THIS TOPIC

1.     Jesus says in Mark 10v14 “Let the little children come to me; and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God” Jesus rebuked His disciples for pushing them way. They were too busy to pay attention to the little children

I quote from everyday with Jesus: 13/03/19. “Today our prisons are full of children who committed adult crimes. And generally speaking, when we study them we find that because they never learned to express their emotions in constructive ways, they ended up exploding”

1.     God counseled Adam and Eve in Gen 2v16-17

2.     Prov 11v14 – Where there is no counsel the people fall/perish, But in the multitudes of counselor there is safety (NKJV)

“Without good direction, people lose their way. The more counsel you follow, the better your chances.” – Prov 11v14 (Message Bible)

3.     Is 9v6 – Jesus is called counselor e.g. He counseled the Samaritan woman, Nicodemus, twelve disciples etc

 

THE NEED FOR COUNSELING CHILDREN

The teacher must know a little bit about the child and the problem he or she has. Some children need counseling because of the following:

1.     Physical Defects: e.g.,

a)     Blindness,

b)    Stammering

c)     Talking too fast

d)    Being too fat or thin

e)     Having birth mark that makes them look different or being crippled. Children with physical defect must be encouraged, loved and accepted by all.

2.     Emotional Distress: Causes include

a)     Difficulty in learning at school

b)    Lack of love

c)     Low Intelligent Quotient (IQ)

d)    Being hyperactive

e)     Being sexually or physically abused or the death of a loved one.

Signs in emotional distressed

                                i.            Constant shifting of feet

                              ii.            Inability to sit down in a particular place

                            iii.            Biting of nails

                           iv.            Being fearful in some cases

                             v.            Bed wetting

                           vi.            Stammering

3.     Spiritual Problem:

a)     They may not be able to pray or read their bible

b)    They may be possessed or oppressed by the devil or demons.

c)     They may have one sinful habit that they have tried to overcome but have not been able to

d)    They may know Jesus as their Saviour and Lord but not have their assurance of salvation

4.     Problem in Family

Family problems often make children come out when an altar call or invitation is given during a revival or church service e.g.

a)     Their parents may be quarreling/ fighting or even divorced

b)    They may come from a polygamous home

c)     Probably staying with grandparents or living with a wicked stepmother, extended relatives or a single parents

d)     Hunger through poverty or that their parents have not paid their school fees

e)     Their parents may be sick or may travel or may have lost one or both parents.

5.     Problem in School:

Children face a lot of problems in school:

a)     The children may be under academic or peer pressure

b)    They may not like the teacher or the school

c)     They may have just moved to a new school and have no friends.

d)    They may be bullied or be a bully.

e)     They may not be able to hear or see well and there leading to their failure in school.

f)      They may not have time to do homework because once they get home they go out to sell things on the street and they will not be able to do well in school.

6.     Negative Neighborhood Influence:

For children who grow up in bad and congested areas, places near markets and bus and trailer stations, they tend to have bad friends. Their friends may be people who are thieves, area boys and armed robbers, the children in these areas could be victims of bullies or be bullies themselves.

7.     Different Religious Background:

If children of nominal Christians, Muslims and traditionalist come to your service on most occasions, they will need counseling and a one-on-one follow-up.

 

AFTER COUNSELING PROCESS:

1.     Keep praying for the child.

2.     Take the house or school address and visit him/her.

3.     Take the phone number

4.     Make a counselor’s diary where the teacher will write the name, address, age and town and state of the child. This will serve as the counselor’s prayer book.

 

TYPES OF COUNSELING

1.     Counseling for salvation.

2.     Counseling for needs than salvation

 

1.     Counseling for Salvation:

In most cases, children respond to altar calls during church services and revivals. Whether the child understands what salvation means or why she/he need salvation. When counseling for salvation take the following steps in having:

a)     Assurance of salvation

b)    Acknowledge their sin

c)     Confession of sin i.e. Let them confess their sins and accept Jesus as their Lord and Saviour. Accept the righteousness that has been made available for them through Jesus Christ. Rom 10v3.

d)    Give brief instruction about how they can grow e.g. use different activities to teach the verse.

                                                        i.            Giving thanks to God when they wake up.

                                                      ii.            Memorizing the scripture

                                                    iii.            Meditating on the word of God

                                                   iv.            Singing and applying the word of God through songs: God has something to say/2x Listen, listen, pay full attention, for God has something to say.

                                                     v.            Thanking God for each day and committing their sleep into God’s hand.

2.     Counseling for Needs Other than Salvation:

These other needs include: Being afraid, bed wetting, having bad dreams, having problems at home, examination fever, having no peace because of sin in their lives, grieving because of death in the family, behavioural problems, poverty and neglect from family members, inability to make friends.

 

            Children teacher must use the word of God to direct and guide the children in any problem they may bring.

            The counselor must listen to the child and verified information and fact given by the child.

                                       

QUALITIES OF A COUNSELOR OF CHILDREN

1.     Be a born again, growing Christian.

2.     Be prayerful i.e. An intercessor

3.     A person who known the Bible

4.     Must love and have a good understanding of children

5.     Be sensitive to Holy Spirit.

6.     Discerning spirit

7.     Have a listening ear and a loving, caring heart.

8.     Be patient

9.     Be ready to spend for the children (money, time and resource).

 

BIBLE VERSES THAT CAN BE USED DURING COUNSELING TIME

1.     Anger – Eph 4v26

2.     Assurance of salvation – 1 John 3v1-3

3.     Hatred, disliking a person – Lev 19v17 and 1 John 4v7-8

4.     Lying, gossip – Eph 4v25, John 8v44

5.     Confession of sin – 1 John 1v9

6.     Cheating – Proverbs 20v17

7.     Laziness – Prov 6v9-11

8.     Stealing – Eph 4v28

9.     Fighting – Prov 17v14

10.                        Sickness – John 4v46-50, 11v3-4

11.                        Fearful – Ps 56v3-4; Mk 5v33-34; Is 41v10

12.                        God’s protection – Psalms 91

13.                        On grief – 1 Thess 5v13-17

14.                        When alone – Gen 28v15; Ex 33v12.