Husband's Attitude to Relation

 

Introduction:

Our mother and relations are major part of the family. When in relationship, it is inevitable that couples interact with each other’s families. The bibles say in Genesis 2:23-24: A man and woman leave their birth families and begin a new a family, and they are to love and protect each other. A husband who allows his mother or relations to interfere with his marriage is not living up to the commandment given to husband in Ephesians 5:25-33. Boundaries need to be set and then held regardless of the resistance encountered. The reality is that people treat us the way we allow them to treat us. If we permit them to trample the sanctity of our family, then that is what they will do. No one, not even our mother or relations has the right to invade the privacy of our home, and it is the responsibility of the husband to guard the privacy. We should take the lead in gently but firmly explaining to our mother or relations what they are doing that is over the line and assuring them that such behaviour cannot be tolerated. We should remind them that God has given us the responsibility for our family and to relinquish any of that responsibility to them is to disobey God. We should our relationship first and defend it against outside threats. We should also assure them that we still love them, but that the relationship changed and we (husband)are in charge now. That is God’s design for the family, and that is the way it will be.

 

Our Attitude Towards Our Mothers And Relations Who Live With Us:

Mothers and relations should be treated with respect and love, but we must not allow our emotions to entangle us. The best way to disengage an enemy is to make him an ally that is our friend. This is done through God’s grace. Christians can always give the grace of forgiveness (Eph 4:32). It may not stop a mother or relations from interfering, but it will be a source of strength and peace to stand in (Eph6:11-17). The only place to find true peace of heart is in a personal relationship with God through Christ. Bible says “Honour” one’s parents (Exodus 20:12) does require showing them patience, kindness, gentleness, and respect. This applies to our mother and relations too. Wemay not even like them, but we need to choose to act in a loving manner towards them and keep things cordial.

 

How To Show Love To Our Mothers And Relations Living With Us?

God does not want us to be in bitterness. We may not have a perfect relationship with our mothers or relations, but we can love them the very way Christ calls us to, that is the way He love. Though there might be hurtful time, below are the ways we should deal with our attitude towards our mothers or relations living with us.

1.     Pray for them daily: This is a difficult task but we should try our best to pray for our mothers or relations living with us. We are set aside any form of bitterness we have concerning them and bless them and pray for them. As we pray for our mothers or relations living with us, our bitter heart softens. It’s tremendously difficult to remain hateful towards someone while we are praying for them. As we pray for them we would begin to see as Christ sees. We are also called to forgive them as Christ has forgiven us and love them as He loved us.

2.     We should never speak harsh words of them in front of our spouse: We should be ashamed if we engage in such an act of speaking harsh words to our mothers or relations in front of our spouse. Even though we have anything against them we should not be harsh to them especially in front of our spouse. Our mothers or relations must have been one of the people that raised us to the man that we are. Our mothers carried us in her womb. If we are married our mothers or relations are still important. Any form of disrespectful act should not be made to our mothers or relations living with us.

3.     We should include them in our life: Our mothers or relations should be included in our lives. We should learn to welcome them if they come to live with us. Time should be spent with them too. Even though it may be tempting to avoid them especially when we are in the middle of a disagreement, we must remain intentional about spending time with them.

4.     Give them grace: We are not perfect human being. The manner in which they might have treat us may not be kind but we should remember the fact that Christ came to save us and given us grace to be His child despite our sinful nature. We are not greater than them or anyone else. We are both in dire need of Jesus’s love and refinement. Christ’s love towards us is no conditional, and our love for our mothers or relations should also be unconditional. Instead of trying to punish them for their sometimes wrong actions, we need to run to the foot of the cross. This is where our relationship will find healing.

5.     We should never give up on them: Our relationship with our mothers or relations is still not perfect. They makes us extremely irritated at times or we know they will do things in the future that will tempt us to stop speaking to them, shut them out of our lives, and give up. But we should be confident that God has a plan for our relationship. We should know that through it, God is teaching us how to love more like Him. We should be a light to them. When we are tempted to give up we must bring ourselves back to number one on the prayer list for them.

 

Conclusion:

We are called to be a true child of God. We are not called to change our mothers or relations. Instead of trying to shape their actions, we need to deal with our own pride and bitterness. We called to respect them. We are called to pray for them. We are called to love them out of the love for our spouse and love for our Saviour Jesus Christ.